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"Husband is one who is the head of the family, but his wife is the neck, and whichever way she turns, he goes."
A man in Hell asked Devil: Can I make a call to my Wife? After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil : Nothing, Hell to hell is Free.
Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means, Without Information, Fighting Every-time!
Wife: No darling, it means - With Idiot For Ever
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper, So I'd be in your hands all day.
Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper, So I could have a new one every day.
Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping Pills.
Wife: When must I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you
Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are..
Husband: You should have known it the minute I asked you to marry me.
Wife: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest ?
Husband: A lovely Push...!